I'm Not a Belieber.

Ohai there!

There is one boy (though many would profess girl) who's name is on everyone's lips. This "legend's" name - Justin Bieber.

But why? Why have we filled our days with jesting about his sexuality, pondering the exact position of his testicles and laughing at the fact he doesn't know what German is? (see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75nDvFSHCBc) Why, why, why?! We act as though he has contributed to society more than, say, Nelson Mandela or Barack Obama or Socrates or Rosa Parks or Shakespeare. Here are my thoughts on the lovers and the haters:

• LOVERS

The so-called "Belibers" (vom), are Justin's biggest fans who have shown their terrifying, almost religion dedication on numerous occasions:




I think Graham Norton's reaction here says it all. These people are crazy. Genuinely nuts. And I don't know whether it's teenage hormones gone wild or having a popstar their age that pushes them to go out in -10°C?! For me it's pretty inexplicable.

Here's an example of when the Belieber's love backfired:



HOWEVER, despite my utter confusion at all of Justin Bieber's fans without them we wouldn't have experienced this gem of a video. This sophisticated lady offers the most coherent explanation of Bieber-love while being simultaneously hilarious and terrifying in terms of what our society is becoming:



Yeah, I know. Really freaking adorable...

• HATERS

Don't get me wrong haters, I really get where you're coming from. His music is awful, his swagger is idiotic and the obsession is creepy. But seriously, calm down. He is only a teenager, so when you insult him physically, it is still, in essence, bullying. Though it's hard to believe he wants to be a teenager after his appearance in the recent Rolling Stone magasine:



In this he talks about his uneducated thoughts about abortion, sex and even rape (which he describes as "unfortunare")! What's awful about this is that his followers will treat these pearls of wisdom like gospel. Yay, right-wing teenagers...

HOWEVER, he did recreate many Bieber-haters wet dreams on his recent CSI performance. At least he keeps everyone happy in this awful acting performance:

• ON A FINAL NOTE...

You can love him or you can hate him, just please stop talking about him. Please. For the sake of the world and it's future - stop. If I see another Bieber-related trending topic, I might kill myself. So stop.

It is fair to say, I do not have Beiber Fever.

Tara x